"Hi" translated means "I'm an American Idiot!"

I've come to the realization that "hi" is translated into all other languages to mean "I'm an American idiot." When Doug and I were living in Vermont, we would go up to Montreal on occasion. Montreal is part of the french-speaking province of Quebec. So all road signs are in French, everyone speaks French, etc. Now, mind you, my husband WAS the "French Student of the Year" our senior year of high school--proof that the 80-year-old French teacher was sweet on young boys I guess. :) Ten years after high school, I was just grateful he knew that "ouest" was "west" and "est" was "east" (not that I couldn't figure that out)!

Anyhow, on to the story...everywhere we would go you would walk in to a store, museum, restaurant, etc. and the employee would smile and say "bonjour!" To which, I would sheepishly smile and say "hi" in return. This simple utterance of the word "hi" is the well-known code for "I'm an American idiot who doesn't speak a lick of any language other than English so please cater to my lack of intelligence and come down to my level." At which point, the employee politely responds "oh, hi" and carries on with the conversation in English because yes, he or she is actually a minimum of BI-lingual.

So, the point of this story, other than that I wish I had taken my high school Spanish class more seriously, is that it looks like I may get to spend a week in Italy with my husband! Yay! We will be going to Florence, but may try to make a trip down to Rome as well. I'm looking for any recommendations, advice, etc. from those of you who have been to Italy and any suggestions for avoiding being a complete and utter annoyance of a tourist. :)